Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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