Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize