i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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