Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
