So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
