so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
