I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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