Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize