what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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