i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
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