Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Randomize
