remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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