Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
