I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Randomize
