We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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