got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
