I would go down on you faster than GM stock
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Randomize
