I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize