he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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