that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
