I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
