i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
She even gives head with a lisp.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
