Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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