I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
