I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize