Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
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