GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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