PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
