His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Randomize