So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
