Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Randomize
