he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
they're like a gay fantastic four
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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