we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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