So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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