All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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