I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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