I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
