Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Randomize
