i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Is her dick bigger than yours?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
