I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
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