Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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