Porn is love you can see.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
