I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
