is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize