You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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