i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
