grandma shit on top of the toilet
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Randomize
