there was a trapeze. enough said
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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