her vagine was all disorganized.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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