Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
